Posts Tagged ‘Women’

In an O magazine article Looking for Stillness author (Riding In Cars With Boys), Beverly Donofrio goes monastery-hopping (her words) and she discovers ‘peace, clarity, connection, grace and a kind of hush’.  At the end of the article she returns to the Nada Hermitage in Colorado “Where you can hear your own bare feet on the floor”.

When was the last time you heard your own bare feet on the floor?

If you are anything like me noise is embedded into your life. I get up, turn on the news so that I can hear what has transpired in the world while I slept.  Feed excited and hungry dogs/cats, water runs, the coffee pot beeps to let me know when the coffee is ready, the toaster dings, my computer says “Good morning, Jill”, a phone rings and the day is underway.

As the hours progress my heels will click on busy pavement or loafers connect with my office’s hardwood but somehow I missed that moment when my bare feet quietly set my life in motion.

We read to know that we are not alone – C.S. Lewis

Like many I was slightly put off by the title “The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society” . I decided to buy the book anyway (it was on sale) and from the first page I was captivated. For me it blended all the right ingredients; an interesting time in history, fascinating characters and a well paced story line.

I have noticed that other reviews whether they like the book or not, make little mention of the galvanizing event in the book and that was the occupation of Guernsey by the Germans and what life was subsequently like for the island’s occupants. Even Juliet the main character would have seemed amiss in any world other than the post-war England of 1946. The correspondence that she sets in motion could take you from charmed to horrified in the matter of a few sentences. There is nothing sensationalizing about how this is done and that is what makes the book a fascinating read.

I will echo some reviews in saying that it had the bones of a modern day classic but there were some weak areas in the second half that took it back into the ordinary. I have recently learnt that Mary Ann Shaffer died in February of 2008. Whether the introduction of the second author, Annie Barrows or Mary Ann’s health had something to do with the shift in the writing style I could not say.

The book does not rely on grandiose scenes or bombastic characters (except for Mark who does embody the impatience of the social changes to come)  and that is why Hollywood should never touch it.  I do see a Masterpiece Theatre style of production; one that would do justice to the book’s core elements of healing, the beauty of individuality and the allure of the unpretentious.

NB: While we are speaking of television productions that do credit to the original books be sure to catch HBO’s #1 Ladies Detective Agency based on Alexander McCall Smith’s books.

Jill Crossland is the founder of Jill Crossland Coaching and TimeFinders Online Magazine; companies that offer multi level services and resources for today’s 40+ woman.

In her role as the editor of TimeFinders Online Magazine she works to ensure, that the content is always relevant and useful. The writers and contributors are not usually famous, they are women who can truly empathize with the readers; living in the real world of raising children, caregiving, running businesses, navigating (peri)menopause and trying to find time for that hair cut and manicure!

Jill has also created a place where women can find the help that they need in their personal or professional life, so be sure to check out the Create Your Team area of her website.

As a Life and Business Coach, Jill’s coaching style is down to earth and practical. She works with clients across North America and through Skype is able to provide international and video calls. All consultations are followed-up with emails that include detailed session notes, resources & subsequent ongoing support.

She is a regular contributor to The Best Kept Secret, writes a widely read blog and has been a guest on Jungle Red Writers and Pink Expertise. Jill is also a members of  WHO, NABBW, Wheatland Business Women and Canadian Women Business Network. You can also visit her on Facebook, Linked In and Chapter’s online community.

Jill’s Personal Profile:

Jill was born in Nottingham, England. Her first job was as assistant to an antique dealer in Toronto’s Yorkville area. Growing up she lived in many different countries which has helped to develop a very balanced perspective and greater empathy for people and women in particular. Jill went on to earn a degree in Business Administration.

Her professional experiences reflect an ongoing commitment to helping women: from co-ordinating government training programs to her volunteer work in women’s shelters and teaching English in South Korea.

In her own words -

“I like to get an early start to the day by walking Mia, the Australian Shepherd & Duke, the ‘rather neurotic’ chocolate Lab. I am fascinated by what happens in the world from politics to pop culture so my evenings are usually spent with books, newspapers and magazines.
I love good food and am a fairly decent cook, but definitely self taught; as my mother never had the time or patience to teach me, but she did share the secrets of dressing and accessorizing well. My self-indulgences include fresh ground coffee, dark chocolate, red wine and pots of Earl Grey tea.”

My new website is up and running, when you arrive at the main portal or home page you will see that we are now:

• Jill Crossland Coaching
• TimeFinders Magazine
• Create Your Team
• Fabulously Over 40

There will be more new & exciting things to come in 2009.

In TimeFinders Magazine, I want to attract advertisers who are compatible with the content. I am looking for wine, chocolate or luxuary food companies, magazines such as More Magazine,  travel agencies that book great trips for women, and beauty products for women over 35. I would like to include more women’s stories plus writers from the US and over seas. The area that is Fabulously Over 40, will be expanded to include other social media outlets such as FaceBook. There will be podcasting in the coaching area.

So many plans, so little time!

Email us:

• Your comments or suggestions
• About advertising in TimeFinders Magazine
  
• If you would like to write for us
  
• To inquire about joining the group of professional women on Create Your Team

Overall I throughly enjoyed the book. It was a little offputting sometimes as she goes back and forth in order to cover a multitude of people and events. While not as well written in as one might have expected, the pages do pull you into their singularly quirky flow especially when you realize that she writes in the same style as she speaks. The reader is taken behnd the scenes of her life and a litany of events that are fascinating and relevant. Then, suddenly on page 391 (hardcover edition) she writes ‘I think that is enough about my personal life’ and firmly shuts the door. It’s not as though we are voyeurs as it was Ms. Walters herself who invited us in. Up to that point her words had been candid and sincere as she interwove her complicated personal and professional life with the headlines that made up the fabric of her remarkable career.

What is written after that statement reads more like a series of essays, albeit interesting essays but very structured never the less. Even the chapter titles become terse. I finished the book but was less enthusiastic; I felt perplexed as though the most interesting guest had abruptly left my dinner party just as we were about to have dessert and coffee.

For readers who have an interest in the stories behind ‘the story’ this is the memoir for you. And for any female who wants to know more about this media icon “Audition” is well worth your time.

I couldn’t help but notice what a strong and varied representation the female gender had on the non-fiction side of the New York Times Bestsellers list on Sunday. A cross section of very different women, at different points in time and with very different lives.

At #1 we have “Audition” by Barbara Walters. I have just started that book and am so far I am enjoying every page. Number 2 is Julie Andrew’s “Home” which proves that there is a lot more to her life and career than Mary Poppins.

The list goes on to include “Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea” by Chelsea Handler. I don’t know much about that one except that it is a humerous look at her life. Former President, Jimmy Carter writes a tribute to his mother, Lillian in “A Remarkable Mother”.

Cokie Roberts tackles some American founding mothers including Abigail Adams, Margaret Bayard Smith, Martha Jefferson, Elizabeth Monroe, Louisa Catherine Adams, Eliza Hamilton, Theodosia Burr, women who help to shape America’s history in “Ladies of Liberty”. Then, at #10 recent headlines are all too real for Carolyn Jessop, she tells her story of life in a polygamist sect in “Escape”.

All I have to say is move over Elizabeth Gilbert there are new women in town. They are not running to other countries to find themselves, they are all about how to stand and face life head on.

On Jan 4th I wrote a post on my favorite and not so favorite things of ’07 and Elizabeth Gilbert’s “eat. pray, love” got a mention on both lists.

Pro: “I do like her sense of humor and she is honest about herself.”
Con: “Am I the only woman who finds Elizabeth Gilbert somewhat whiny and self-absorbed? I’ve been divorced and traveled alone without all that sobbing and need to please.”

Well, upon more thought the pro statement is a bit insipid and as for the con I seem to be holding back maybe because she had been Oprahized! Time has however revealed that I am not alone in my less than glowing review of her book and I not going to be asked to leave the midlife sisterhood….Whew!

Here is a link to one article in particular “Pray tell: Is Elizabeth Gilbert self-absorbed or truth seeker?” by Carol Memmott USA Today. There are also some interesting comments attached.

Why is this capturing our attention? Probably because it speaks to something larger. It makes us look at how we feel and who we are as women over 40. We are examining where we have been, where we are now and more importantly where we want the road to take us for the next 40 years.

I haven’t finished the book yet, which in itself tells me something because when I love a book I devour it quickly! So far there are two things I know for sure. One, like many of you out there I have a version of being on the bathroom floor. For me I sunk to the floor in my kitchen and it was many years ago. But it happened one time and then I stood up and said “You’ve made some mistakes Jill, rectify them and move forward.” Two, I cannot cling to things or people when it is over because it is over – move on. OK, there is a third thing – that while some of Richards advice is sound, to allow someone to continually refer to you as “Groceries” goes beyond cute, occasional nickname into the realm of complete lack of self-respect and (or) no ability to set healthy boundaries with people.

I hope to hear your thoughts and I promise that I will finish the book ASAP. Perhaps the ‘love’ part in Bali will bring it together for me or maybe not!

Least Favorite from ’07

1. Media obsession with silly, spoilt girls called Paris, Brittany, Lindsey. There are so many women out there who are actually making a difference in the world it is a shame there was no room left to write about them.

2. “eat, pray, love” - Am I the only woman who finds Elizabeth Gilbert somewhat whiny and self-absorbed? I’ve been divorced and traveled alone without all that sobbing and need to please.

3. Screw caps on good wine – I miss the sense of ritual when there is no cork to pull out of a bottle of wine. It speaks to the need for a quiet moment in a busy day. Such as the time we take to make a pot of tea or to grind coffee beans for a really good cup of coffee.

Favorites

1. Web 2.0 – I like the new networking opportunities that websites such as Facebook provide. If used properly & carefully they are a good way to connect with new people and re-connect with former acquaintances.

2. An old friend returns – There is another side to the tech loving me and that is the part of me that needs Austen, Bronte, Thackeray, Masterpiece Theater and all things from a different time in history . So I was pleased when I found Victoria Magazine back on the newsstands this November. Visit their website: Victoriamag.com

3. “eat, pray, love” – I do like her sense of humor and she is honest about herself.

4. Al Gore: He put the issues surrounding global warming out there in such a way that it can no longer be ignored on any level from governments to the person in the street.

5. Hillary Clinton - My coaching advice (I think all political campaigns could use a common sense life coach on staff). You didn’t win the Iowa Caucus but don’t counter with a negative campaign instead challenge the platforms of your opponents, put them in the position where they must be more specific about their campaign promises. You have done well positioning yourself within your roles now do the same by presenting a clear picture of your professional background and experiences.

6. Shopping:

Amazon – Their used books are well priced and good quality

Victoria’s Secret - Cotton panties 5@$25-. Wish that they hadn’t decided to make the waist band narrower however.

Starbucks – Starting to collect their mugs, they should sell them in sets for a reasonable(!) price

Candles – I love the growing availability of healthy candles made of soy or beeswax.

7. More Magazine – It continues to present articles, fashion, travel, everything with the 40+ woman in mind.