Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

January seems from its very position on the calendar to be a month where we are both reflective yet anxious to move forward and achieve new and exciting goals. One of the hardest things to do is to get rid of what is not working.  Which is why this blog Life Deco is causing me some angst. Looking at the dates I don’t write in it as much as I should but then what is the rule there? Should I get rid of it? ………..No………. Where would I have put my tribute to my dog Duke, share books, websites or merely sounded off if it no longer existed? 

It is also a part of my online portfolio. And therein lies some more areas which will need decisions in the next little while. For instance I have a personal Facebook page (who doesn’t) and I have done a good job of adding professional and personal posts but I don’t have a solely business page. Up to now my reasoning was having a coaching company and online magazine leaves little time to dedicate to a vibrant business page however Facebook has emerged as such a strong place to market I really cannot ignore the urgency there. So if I go ahead I have to decide what the marketing angle is going to be. I guess I am adding to my business side, not taking anything away. 

I have added to my personal life also when we adopted a dog from a local humane society in November. Unfortunately things got complicated with his pre-existing leg injury and we had to have the front right leg amputated on December 21 and a bullet removed from his hip. Not to worry he spent the Holidays on a big bed being thoroughly catered to.  Now the drains and stitches are out and his head cone is off he can lick his private parts again so he is feeling happier. We have to work on getting him back to a new physical normal which means building up the strength in the front leg and his overall muscle tone.

I do enjoy stopping here with my cup of tea or coffee so I will try and do so more often. I will share, vent and as I did today think out loud.

Happy 2012, Jill (and this would have been my father’s Birthday – still miss you after all these years)

We don’t have to worry about George Orwell’s Big Brother hiding in our bedroom or cyber stalking us instead he has ended up in the unlikeliest of places our kitchens, school cafeterias and grocery stores seemingly wherever there is food.  

School notes are being sent home to parents telling them what they can and more to the point cannot put in their kids lunches. One school has even intimated in their message that if you love your child you will not send cookies to school with them. Denmark has introduced the world’s first fat tax – a surcharge on foods that are high in saturated fat. And media headlines debate obese children being taken from their parents.

There is no doubt we have a worldwide health crisis around obesity in persons of all ages but shouldn’t the family kitchen be the first line of defense? A base line of counseling and education; which not only teaches what constitutes healthy eating but showing how to budget time and money so that the outcome is a realistic eating plan.  The excuse of too busy and too expensive to put a balanced meal on the table is wearing thin, no pun intended.

I have a diabetic husband and a busy life too. One day a week I run all my errands, meet clients or friends for lunch or coffee and I shop. On that day if you’re not on the list we don’t meet, if the dry cleaning isn’t ready it waits a week and 7-days’ worth of meals is purchased. Pre-planning meals saves money & time, reduces waste and ensures three well balanced meals each day. I have also taught myself to decipher those nutrition labels and ingredient lists; my focal points are sugar (in all its disguises), fibre and sodium. 

All is not perfect I answer emails while eating breakfast and work through lunch; what was in that sandwich anyway? Between 5:30 and 6pm I close the office, pour myself a glass of wine, and start dinner. Even though we don’t eat until about 7pm most nights but we always sit down and share that meal. We also don’t deprive oursleves; you will find cookies and chocolate in my pantry and dessert served at the weekends but neither of us has a weight issue and we didn’t need to see a dietician anymore; I have the diabetic meal planning down pat. 

It is probably time to examine those cultures not struggling with these obesity issues. France, parts of Asia and certain Mediterannean countries have longevity and healthy citizens perhaps the government needs to get out of our refrigerators and take a trip.

Here are some foodie articles that were the research for this post:

School Lunches in France by  Vivienne Walt

Why just a junk food ban by Bronwyn Eyre

Out of the Frying Pan by Jennifer Sygo

A rescued dog with a lot of love in him and for quite awhile some serious issues; he was loving referred to in this blog as the neurotic chocolate lab; Duke went over The Bridge, August 19^th.  His final post is dedicated to ………….

What Duke Learnt – In His Own Words 

Eating a stick of butter off the kitchen counter makes your tummy ache 

When you’re scared good mummies take your head in their hands and tell you how handsome and smart you are 

My first Australian Shepherd sister Jenna took care of me & taught me important dog stuff 

Australian Shepherds are bossy and tell you that all the toys are theirs 

I got so sad when Jenna went away but then funny Mia came to live with us 

Wow, mom can get peanut butter to come out of these black rubber things and my dog chow to fall out of orange balls 

I don’t have to be afraid of TVs, candles, fireworks, foil, ball caps or thunder  

It’s kinda cool to have a cat friend who sleeps with you 

If I smile at dad when he comes home from work it makes him laugh 

The best thing about winter is my favourite blanket warm from the dryer 

Happiness is the dog park, dirty tennis balls, bison bones, my plastic purple squeaky toy 

For some reason it’s not ’helpful’ when I lick the dishes in the dishwasher 

Mom makes a really funny noise when I wipe my cookie crumb mouth on her black pants 

When you get old your head and body don’t feel good  

On Friday daddy was sad, Dr Jodi is talking softly; mummy took my head in her hands and whispered “You are handsome and smart and you’re going to see Jenna” 

What I learnt is I am loved ………… 

Thank you to Ringneck Kennels for taking in a once troubled young chocolate Labrador Retriever and then entrusting him to our care.  

For looking after Duke not only physically but mentally we are so grateful to Dr. Jodi Silvernagle and all the staff at the Animal Care Centre of Strathmore.   

 

A friend lent me this book as I am grappling with the mental and physical decline of my oldest dog. You will find though that you don’t need to own a pet  to be swept up in the story of Denny, an up-and-coming race car driver, his family and the events that reshape their lives.

Garth Stein’s book stands out among the overly long list of doggy literature and it doesn’t have the fluff of Marley & Me. It is a humans’ story as told by their dog Enzo. He proves to be a wise, funny and ultimately philosophical narrator. If like me, you prefer not to look at life’s bigger issues through a spiritual purple haze his worldview even if it is from ground level is refreshingly logical. The reader will find themselves thinking about an odd assortment of things from their thumbs to the big stuff like navigating life as though you’re on a race track, hence its compelling title.

This is one of those books that affects everyone differently which makes The Art Of Racing in the Rain a great book club choice. Published in 2008 it came into my life at the right time. Reading about living and dying from a dogs perspective enabled me to step back from the overwhelming heaviness of it all.

As he nears the end of his life, avid TV watcher Enzo is fascinated by a documentary about Mongolia where dogs are laid to rest high in the hills. While I cannot give that to the chocolate Labrador who has shared my life for many years; I can grant him this last summer to warm his aching body and perhaps bring some peace to a now cloudy mind. And I know that he too will tell me when it is time.

I finished the book knowing a lot more about life of the Chinese immigrants in Gold Mountain (Canada). Descriptions of present day China and some of its 20^th century history were also eye opening and fascinating.

The flow of this memoir is however uneven. Fong Bates has a wonderful way with words as illustrated in her more descriptive passages. Had she turned that deft talent to allowed us to get to know her and the relatives that she encountered in more depth the book would have been richer and ultimately more fulfilling. Instead there are sketchy bits about this and that person and as for the author she is an aloof and withdrawn narrator.

It is not easy to recognize that our parents were ‘people’ first. They loved and hated, laughed and cried, succeeded and failed all before they became a mother or father. For someone who went to China openly seeking her father’s story’ Fong Bates’ comes across as surprising judgemental of the truths as they reveal themselves.

The book is a quick read, enjoyable and interesting but it is not up to the gushing reviews that some have written. Jan Wong in The National Post writes a well balanced review.

With Your Biscotti & Coffee

1) I had never given much thought to the notes scribbled in the margins of books until I read about Professor Jackson and her two decades of researching ‘marginalia’. From the sidelines by Kathryn Blaze Carlson

2) It takes a team to successfully find the right home for a foster child and St. Loius is paving the way to proving that;  Foster Care: Extreme Edition by Curtis Sittenfeld

3) Curl up with a second mug of coffee and be prepared to view some of the worlds greatest art collections;  Google Art Project

There are plenty of people speaking out over the perceived harshness in the Chinese ‘Tiger Moms’ child rearing style. With near epidemic school bullying, little girls in kitten heels and make-up and our boys struggling in school with record low grades perhaps all is not going so well in North American homes either.

I had an English upbringing; a child rearing style that lacked in spontaneous hugging and trips to amusement parks; along with a zero tolerance for whining and not eating one’s vegetables. There were rules and there was discipline. On the other side of the coin talking things through and being heard was only a cup of tea away.  I was loved in that ‘we are here when you need us, always do your best, try everything once and treat people with respect’ way.

The world’s children can not be bought up in a universally approved homogenized process. Cultural differences in raising a family shouldn’t bring with it an assumption that being strict translates into an absence of humour or love.

Maintaining a steady grade average, taking part in carefully chosen extra curricular activities as well as learning good manners, deference to personal boundaries and self-reliance aren’t old fashioned they make for a well adjusted adult. Without these traits many of today’s ready to enter the work force young adults are about to learn that the world doesn’t have time for their poor inter-personal and communication skills, inability to empathize and over inflated sense of self.

With Your Biscotti & Coffee

Continuing our look at the younger generation …………

1) Peggy Orenstein’s Cinderella Ate My Daughter. To purchase amazon.com

2) Before heading off to college some students are going out into the world to expereince adventure and  volunteerism. Is the gap year worth it? by Sean Gregory

3) Can Google Earth enhance the reading experience for students? What the Joads Saw by Vanessa Farquharson

It seems as though we were just celebrating the arrival of a new century and here we are a decade into it. 

In 2010 Jill Crossland Coaching grew in the way that I had engineered, veering away from life coaching and taking on more business clients, an unexpected plus was working with male entrepreneurs. This works well as not all women like my direct and down to earth coaching style. As I said to one female client last month ”You don’t pay me to agree with you.”

TimeFinders Magazine is looking for a new name that better encapsulates its broad demographic with the common denominators of being a woman with a business, family and personal life. Contest details can be found at the bottom of the home page.

In 2010 I became part of  The Nuttermother online book club because I wanted to broaden my book choices; while I didn’t read every book the ones I choose took me  away from my usual genres. If you haven’t done so already I recommend that you read Little Bee and The Help before taking on the latest crop of bestsellers. Little Bee brings you face to face with the question what would you do in a life and death moment. While also looking at the possible actions of a significant other if they were there beside you.

The Help should be read before the movie comes out in August of this year. I am not convinced that Hollywood will do justice to the subtle nuances of both the characters and the time in which they live. I would have preferred to see the story brought to life through an HBO or PBS”s Masterpiece Contemporary production.  By the way if you were a fan of Upstairs, Downstairs new episodes are being broadcast in April.

Last years crop of  mainstream TV shows had very few bright spots apart from The Good Wife and Blue Bloods; both shows have a strong cast and well written story lines. For me The Walking Dead was just another zombie show only with a better cast and script then usually accompanies this type of entertainment. Whatever your entertainment preference is it is important to carve out time to relax. 

Every January I encourage clients to avoid the vicious circle of resolutions and instead we work on setting realistic goals and format a plan to find personalized solutions to problems. It is best to stay away from the one size fits all answers to life’s challenges. The National Post had another approach in their article “Instead of resolutions why not try solutions?”. The first thing that I have done was to purchase the new Blackberry Torch this weekend in the hopes of being a bit more efficient when out and about. Now to find the time to set it up to meet my specifications.

I haven’t mentioned the dogs in awhile. Mia is as lovely and easy going as always. She is enjoying the dog park that the town has finally opened. Neurotic Duke was really good  at the park for a couple of weeks but then suddenly started to be grumpy with the others dogs so we had to make the decision to stop taking him. That’s my boy, always a challenge no matter how old he gets.

I hope that you continue to drop by Life Deco and I will endeavor to stay current in my writings. Happy New Year!

Spirituality and religion are entities that I tend to analyze; never quite sure how they fit in my worldview. I also find it fascinating that as women we once lived lives influenced by the moon cycles, ran homes steeped in seasonal rituals, were both healer and keeper of ancient family stories and traditions.  

Today December 21st is Winter Solstice and it is steeped in female folklore:

Women and the Moon

Celebrating Winter Solstice is a bit long but interesting

As a coach I often hear women say that there is an emptiness or void inside of them and perhaps the key to filling that lies in a re-connection with our past. An untamed beach with waves crashing in powerful harmony speaks to my ancient Anglo-Saxon self. And is probably the closest to a spiritual experience that I have known to date.

As a New Year begins our ancestry may hold unexpected revelations about ourselves. The success of 2011 is in the soil between your fingers as you plant herbs, a mountain climbing expedition or returning to the religion of your childhood.    

With Your Biscotti & Coffee

1) The first written record of this sport dates back to 712. Cleaning Up Sumo by Hannah Beech/Saitama Sakae

Two Interesting Women

2) Dr. Hawa Abdi – Heroic, Female and Muslim by Nicholas D. Kristof

3) The perfume business is not all roses especially for perfumer Patricia de Nicolai, Scent of a Woman by Nathalie Atkinson